Too Used To

So today I was in familiar pain.   Hateful, resented, yucky pain.

I’m struggling.   Ever since I returned from England I haven’t come down from this flare.  I sat and tried to think of the best way to describe it, and this is what I came up with: it’s like chewing on tinfoil, but inside my bladder.  With the Fibromyalgia I can hear my collar bone, shoulders, elbows and neck snapping like a broom handle each time I move.

I’m fighting to stay positive.  I know I will remit at some point, I just wish that point were today, right now.  I’m depressed for sure, I can’t stop crying.  This always happens when I’m at my limit.  I’m depressed that I can’t play my piano except for in small bursts.  I hate that I hate getting the groceries and cooking, I used to love it.

To pass the pain time I’ve been reading “The Historian”.  Very good book so far.  I also was able to adjust my TV channels.  Hooray for upgraded cable service!  I’ve been spending my time watching prerecorded programs.  I can sit and not move and have the instant gratification of watching one episode after the other instead of having to wait, plus no commercials.

Hmmm, in other news I have purchased some drying racks for our clothes.  After staying with my Sister and Weasel, I learned of these fabulous upright drying racks that are easy to stow away when not in use.  I looked everywhere in town and couldn’t find them, then I found some on Amazon.  I’m hoping the new racks will save us money on our electric bill.  I pondered how everyone around me is on this green kick, (Use your own bags at the grocery!  Drive electric cars!  Don’t use chemicals in your home!) yet we have massive energy draining appliances.  Why not sell us the little washers and drying racks?  I’m confused.

For several months my keyless entry for my car has been broken.  I was so sad.  It was a pain not to be able to use it.  Husband helped me out and fixed the it last night.  Now it works again and it’s like Christmas!

Today was the first day of Youngest’s gymnastics class.  She did wonderfully!  Already a star pupil.  She’s very motivated and has excellent control and balance.  I was so proud.  She’s coming in at the sixth week of the class term, so the other kids have had quite a head start.  She wasn’t intimidated and kept up with them with no trouble at all.

The teacher pulled me aside after class and stated that we had made a great move signing her up because she obviously had a gift for it.  Well, obviously!  (hee hee) My darling girl is amazing.

I’m hoping for good sleep tonight.  No school tomorrow, so no alarms.  Yay!

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~ by blanketgirl on October 16, 2009.

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